What I've Learned Thus Far

I was recently reminded that when God breaks us of a strongly-held expectation the process can be painful.

This year is our sixth year homeschooling! You would think I know what I'm doing by now, but the only thing I know for sure is that every year brings a different obstacle and you're reminded your children aren't the only students in the home.

This year tension between my expectations and our reality was steadily building and it finally piqued a couple of Tuesdays ago when math took literally hours to accomplish and not even one complete lesson could was finished. I choked back tears that day as I fought hard to remind myself of the countless success stories I've heard from adults who suffered through their early school career, but bloomed in their adult careers. In a mind that was bleak and begging for guidance on what the heck this learning stuff was supposed to look like for the Saavedra family, that little glimmer of light shone distant, but hopeful. I trusted God for that final product, but what to do in the mean time was beyond me.

Four children, one mother. Four learning styles, one mother. Countless goals and dreams and visions. One mother.

One God.

That day broke me. And I'm glad. God always answers our brokenness.

Here are the lessons He taught me based on that God-designed disaster of a day.

1. My home school will not, need not, look like a formal school setting. I was attempting to teach Math and English to all three official students at the dining room table at the same time even though the children are in three different grade levels. The multitasking of different concepts and different learning styles was frying my brain and my patience. It wasn't pretty. Since that fateful Tuesday I no longer do that. I now spend more time teaching one-on-one with the two middle children while Simon plays and Kaeley works independently. Other subjects can be done together, but that morning school is an ugly thing when I try to do too many things at one time merely because it feels more official.

2. We are not "behind". My tendency in the past has been to deem someone "behind", which has led to pushing a student up and over a learning obstacle rather than allowing them to build their own muscles and explore ways over it on their own. I love my children, and my intention is to give them the best education we can, but this act of pushing a child to what I thought they should be doing based on what their peers were doing, was mostly rooted in fear. I'm no longer afraid (at least not at the moment). I still want to offer them the best education, but I've come to accept that the "best education" doesn't mean finishing a particular text book within a particular school year. If my children learning and thriving within the learning process, then I deem us as on track!

3. I can not do everything well all at the same time. I homeschool better these days, which, as it turns out, means my house is a lot messier for a longer period of time. While I would like to have a productive homeschooling day, visit the YMCA, make a healthy dinner for the family, and have a clean home, it just isn't realistic. If I spend a beautiful morning learning alongside my children and half the house is turned upside down as those children play and explore, and Bibles are studied and relationships are built, than praise God and I thank Him for Stouffer's lasagnas and paper plates!

4. My children are individuals and our family is unique. What I mean by that is so is yours! What works for my family might not work for yours and vice-versa. The methods of education that help your family thrive cannot be copied. They must sought.

5. It's okay to ask for help. This is something we all probably believe until it comes to implementing it for ourselves. It was for me anyway. Whether it's asking for prayer on challenges that are twisting our brains into knots (like how half a math lesson can last for hours) or it's asking for physical help, do it! I had my precious few praying for me on that ugly Tuesday. I finally asked my parents to help the early readers once or twice a week. And the results have been beautiful! Prayers were answered, courage was given, quiet and confident help was administered, and we all benefited, so why I thought I needed to do it all myself can only boil down to pride.

So much hope. So much help. One God.

What's a lesson you've learned this year?